Roleplay for One | The Phantom Train (Part 1)
Edited audio transcript

Edited from an automatic transcription of the original recording. Strong language is masked; selected personal asides and adult material are marked [Editorial omission.]. Transcription errors may remain, especially in names and lyrics. Timestamps come from the source; paragraphs split for readability can share a timestamp. The original recording contains adult language and themes. Announcements and offers reflect the recording date.
Source: https://www.buzzsprout.com/2187585/episodes/9468661-roleplay-for-one-the-phantom-train-part-1.mp3

[0:00] You're about to listen to the first experimental season of our show, formerly called Nat One Presents the Podcast.

[0:07] For better audio quality and our current ongoing D D campaign, skip ahead to season two featuring the Daft Monks. On this episode of Nat One Presents.

[0:17] And I'm like, oh man, that sucks. You're so old. Come inside, have a seat.

[0:21] Oh, oh no, I wouldn't sit in this chair, not in this disgusting filth-covered chair. How gross. By the way, do you need a chair? Should I use the bathroom or just [expletive] on your floor? It doesn't seem to make a difference.

[0:36] Adventure. Hot woman stories. Role-playing that could only be seen by the gods. Here at Nat 1%, you get all that and more. Now join us as we adopt another epic day of content.

[0:53] Just kidding. This is Nat OnePresents, a tabletop role-playing game podcast that takes your favorite nerdy games and pop up your icons and ruins them with improv.

[1:04] Hello and welcome to Net OnePresents the podcast. Yo.

[1:11] How's it going? What's up?

[1:12–3:40] [Editorial omission.]

[3:40] I have uh instant buyer's remorse, like especially if someone challenges me, like it works on me every time. Like if someone's like, Well, if you can't afford it, and I'm like, hey [expletive], I can't afford it, and I'll show you I'm gonna buy it right now.

[3:52] It's like Yu-Gi-Oh! and he like picks up the car and just like holds it up, like boom.

[3:56] Yeah, and then immediately when I got the bag and I go to my car, I'm like, Man, what the [expletive] did I why did I do that?

[4:02] I'm a sucker. And then it there was the worst one time. It was the rainbow vacuum people. [expletive] you. They came to my house, two old ladies, sweetest ladies that could be. Like, do they knock on doors? Do they make an appointment?

[4:14] Well, it was like something else where another friend of mine bought a rainbow vacuum he's like, Hey, could you do me a solid and just have them come over and do your spiel? You don't have to buy anything if you don't want. And I was like, Oh, sweet, I won't buy that. You know, I don't need that vacuum. And then they came over and they're like, What a lovely home. And then, like, first of all, that's [expletive] because at the time we were living in this double wide uh manufactured home, so it was not that lovely of a home. No big deal if you live in one, but I'm just saying, like, it wasn't that great.

[4:43] Yeah, you can tell when someone's giving you like the script, you know, like yeah, for sure. So then they do their little thing, she starts vacuuming up my living room, and Megan had just got done vacuuming, and then they put the little filter out, and they're like, Oh, look at that.

[4:57] Can you see that? And this little filter was just completely covered in dirt and [expletive].

[5:01] And she's like, Can you believe that you are living in this filth right now with the vacuum? No, she didn't say that. Yes, filth, she used the word filth. Filth. And I'm she read you for filth. Yes, I felt so embarrassed and disgusted that we were living in such filth after she said that. And then we ended up buying this [expletive] vacuum. It was like a $2,000 vacuum. And then as soon as they left, me and Megan looked at each other, like, what the [expletive] did we just do? And then I was angry. I'm like, Can you believe she had the nerve to come into my house and call me filthy? Like, the house is clean, like your [expletive] little trip.

[5:01] I bet there was already dirt in that filter, you know, and then she vacuumed that up.

[5:40] Either way, uh, the next day I called her and said, You need to come get this vacuum because we don't want that. And she's like, Well, are you sure about that? I'm like, Yeah, because I saw the contract that we have 24 hours to return this vacuum to you, so you need to come pick this up. I don't want it anymore.

[5:55] I'm not paying you any money. Take your stupid water rainbow vacuum and get the [expletive] out of here. I was mad still. Wait, did you actually like swear, maybe? Like, oh, I probably didn't swear. I'm pretty professional when it comes down to it.

[6:05] But the the worst thing, they I didn't tell you this before, is that she's doing her spiel.

[6:09] The other lady was just laughing and shaking her head, like, look how filthy, like disgusting. And she was like, do facial expressions. She's like, Look at that.

[6:19] And the other lady's like, ooh, yeah, gross.

[6:23] So she was like a hype male.

[6:25] They like us, but like older face.

[6:27] And instantly, like, I'm looking at her, she's talking to me. I look over at the other lady with her like sneering [expletive] nose upturned at my [expletive] dirty carpet. Well, take it. Yeah, I'm instantly mad. God, I'm getting flustered just thinking about it. Oh man, dude. [expletive] that's that's bananas. I think maybe the fact that they were older, like young salespeople, I'm like, oh, like, I know how to do this. But the old ones, like, I don't know. Like, they they maybe it's like because I have this like assertion that maybe they do know better. I don't know. Something about the older salespeople like tends to be more effective. So maybe it's just the fact that old women were like, oh, that's a dirty house.

[6:27] Like, well, they're old and they're women, they must know what they're doing.

[7:07] Especially when they're coming up and they're like, Oh, thank goodness you have the handicap ramp up to your door. I really need it. My bones hurt.

[7:14] And I'm like, Oh man, that sucks. You're so old. Come inside, have a seat. Oh, you're not.

[7:19] Oh no, I wouldn't sit in this piece of it. Yeah, not in this disgusting filth-covered chair. How gross. By the way, do you need a chair? Should I use the bathroom or just sit on your floor? It doesn't seem to make a difference.

[7:37] I'm still mad. Like, how what kind of tactic is that?

[7:40] You know? Geez Louise. I can see this is a house where you don't take the shoes off when you come inside, huh?

[7:48] There's there's there's nothing like wrong. So it's hard to be a salesperson, and we're not [expletive] on you if you're a salesperson or you do those like like you sell makeup or you sell knives, like everybody's a pyramid scheme. Anyone who's trying to make a living can like hold a job. Like, I respect that and I respect you, but there's definitely so there's these programs that are just so pyramid schemy and it like hurts, it's so cringy. So uh I don't have a story as funny as yours by any means. But I I we lived on this uh this apartment complex and we shared like a wall with another apartment, and over time we became friends with these people, and they were pretty chill.

[7:48] They started to kind of annoy me over time, but for the most part, uh I'm a like I grew up leaving my door unlocked, yeah. They would just come in, which I thought was like, no, like I'm not that kind of like person. Like, and then one time I was taking a nap and I woke up and the girl was just like next to me, and she just like waited for me to wake up and I was like, Whoa, killer, and then maybe she was just there for like a minute or a couple seconds. I don't know, but I was just like, You need to get the [expletive] out. And I we're locking the door, but anyway, where I was going with this was the very start of the friendship.

[7:48] At first, like, I'm like, all right, let's be friends with our neighbors, and then like you know, let's make a gesture. So they're like, Hey, um, do you want to come over for pizza? We're just gonna like I'm just having some friends over for pizza or something. I don't remember the excuse, but like maybe he said games afterwards or something. We're gonna like do something and then play games or whatever. So I was like, all right, sure. And I go, and then like I'm sitting there, and then he's like waiting for other people. And it's not like you know, like you had like your family or friends over, you'd be like, hey, oh what's up, Dan? Like, oh, what's up, Mike?

[7:48] Like these people were all just kind of like in there waiting to see what was about to happen. I'm like, oh no, oh no.

[9:37] So this was, and it's a thing here in Tucson. I still see people on social media, I won't name names, but I still see them like promoting this business and they're part of it. But it was basically you pay in for a vacation and then you sell vacations, and once a year you get a free vacation from a list of vacations. I don't I don't remember the model, right? But you had to pay like a monthly thing, and then you picked a trip, and if you sold people more than you, you got up like to the next tier of like so you got better, yeah, you got better trips, and and and everybody had the one thing that stands out. I don't remember the name of the organization, but everybody takes these photos.

[9:37] They don't say like you should be here or something, and it's like a blue and white.

[10:18] And uh, have you seen it? No, I know I can picture it in my head though, how [expletive] pictures everywhere, and I just all I remember was just being so pissed because I'm like, You told me we were gonna play games and eat pizza, and this is a sales. And you presented it, and and then he like so he's like, Are you gonna sign up? And I was like, uh let me uh yeah, just give me a good day. And then I didn't, right? But like that was a smear like on the trust, and like it it took a while for me to like they would be like, Come on, do something like no, I'm good, like you know, like I don't know, you're gonna invite me over.

[10:18] And there was something weird because like they could like hear they joked, like, oh, we can hear when you sing the shower and stuff, because they were like next door. So it was just like weird, I felt very betrayed by these people that I didn't know very well, but shared a space, and so yeah, those programs always like those pyramid schemes, it just blows my mind.

[11:06] Oh, yeah, and they always come out of it saying that it's not. They're like, No, no, no, you really need to listen to what I'm saying.

[11:11] So it starts at the top, right? And then it branches down. Yeah, this can't be a pyramid scheme, it's more like a tree scheme. It's like it's like no, it's definitely not poison, like unproctored, like without like, no, it's not poison. Like, it's definitely not poison. Like, yeah, yeah, I probably think it's [expletive] poison, like you know, and it probably is guaranteed [expletive]. So, yeah, I don't know. It's uh that's it's like an icky feeling, you know? And like those programs are built on pressure. Sales in general is about pressuring people, but those programs you get friends to get, like you throw parties, right? Like, so you you bring groups together, and then you get they always do this every program.

[11:11] I guarantee you, if you're ever in a temporary party, who all right, who's ready to sign up? Right, and some poor schmuck always raises their hand, too. Because they just like raising their hand, maybe many, right? They're like, oh, what are we doing?

[12:01] I've zomed out the entire time.

[12:02] If someone does that, and then you feel [expletive] because I'm like, well, that [expletive] random [expletive] was signing up for it, but I like don't want to, but now I feel pressured. It's it's bad, man. Oh, yeah. It's bad. I think in a group setting like that, I would be less pressured. I'd be like, Look at this idiot. They're gonna buy a $2,000 vacuum. I'm getting out of here. Oh my gosh. Look how dirty their [expletive] house is. Maybe when it's not focused on you, right? I don't know. They played like a DVD and it was like a video of like people on vacation, and I'm just sitting there.

[12:29] And also there wasn't pizza. There was like pizza bites or something.

[12:32] It was like a first- Well, it wasn't even real pizza. Wasn't even [expletive] real pizza. I think he eaten up some bagel bites. And I like, I don't know if you know this about me. I have a big [expletive] appetite. Like, I came a lot more. I I want no, I couldn't, because I'm not like a [expletive] savage, right? But like if you and I like went out, I would eat all the chips and salsa and just keep asking for more. And I would like, I would like just get my weight in food. So when I go over, I always hate when I go to people's house because like there's eight mozzarella sticks. Like, honestly, I want at least five. I'm not kidding me. Like, dead serious. So then, so that was even worse too.

[12:32] I'm like, it's [expletive] no pizza, it's [expletive] bago bites, and I want at least nine of them. And there's like 12 people here, and there's six bites. He bought one small box one of the small boxes. So [expletive] that. Man, not even real [expletive] pizza. That's disappointing. Do you have any? I I have let's just talk about [expletive] like [expletive] sales experiences because I can think of some. Like, do you have any other? I have one more.

[13:28] Uh let me think about one. Because uh, did I ever tell when I got um I had a girlfriend at the time and we bought her car?

[13:37] So you mentioned you sign or you signed for someone, but yeah, so that was it.

[13:41] And then they that was the weirdest thing because we just walked the Jetta?

[13:45] No, oh, the keys where they threw you the keys.

[13:47] Yeah, they just threw me the keys. Yeah, that was the weirdest one. The Jetta one. I showed up what the [expletive]? Yeah, I showed up wanting something, and he talked me into the Jetta, a champagne-colored [expletive] four-cylinder non-turbo Jetta. I drove it the hepping.

[14:02] I don't know, man. Can I imagine you like drove by something reflective and we were like, who's that show? You're like, oh my god, it's me. At the time, I was like really into tuner cars, so and then I walked away this four-door sedan and I drove it all the way back to Perump. And I'm like, how the [expletive]? Why did I get this? Guys, if you know Nate, like I could never [expletive] imagine you in a champagne, a Jetta alone, but a [expletive] champagne dollar one. Holy [expletive]. Blew my mind too, Nate. It was like an out-of-body experience for me. As soon as I got home and looked in my driveway, I'm like, what the [expletive] did I just do, man?

[14:02] We it it I don't know, we're like pressured into sales at like such a young age. Like, so remember like the fundraisers for school where you have to. I don't know what your school did, but for me it was like candles or like jelly beans, and they were like $30 for a candle and like a small box of jelly beans. It was like $45. Like, that's a good deal, mom. And they [expletive] were like, if you sell this many, you get a prize, and it was some dumb [expletive] thing. Some so they start you so young. They start you so young. And then one of my like like earliest vacations was actually to Vegas.

[14:02] Um when I because I was living in Rhode Island, but my grandparents were real into Vegas, so my mom they brought me and my mom over and we got to go with them. And we were walking the strip, and it was someone proactive was really big back then, right? And I was like in middle school, so I had like some acne or whatever. And the guy was like trying to be like, Oh, like this will help your skin. We're like, no, thank you. And he's like, have fun with your acne. And I was like, I'm 12.

[15:30] Like, I need like that's a bit much. Like, one, totally unnecessary.

[15:36] Like, it's not like we led the guy on, it's not like we were like, no, no, no, no. Like, you know, like we just were like, no, thank you. Like, frankly, like we're kind of poor, like, we can't afford that kind of stuff. We're just we're like doing most of the free attractions here. And this guy was just like, Enjoy your acne, like, and it was just like to children. I'm like, okay, you're you're kind of a tool. Like, I hope that guy like contracted something horrible, right? Like, fall down in front of a car. Also in Vegas. Oh, you know, the shoe cleaning people, yeah. So I had these really cool high tops that I liked, and he's like, Hey man, let me clean your shoes.

[15:36] It's free, it's on the house, and then maybe I'll sell you the product afterwards. And I'm like, okay, cool. So he cleans my right shoe. And he's like, Alright, you think about buying the product? Look at that.

[16:18] And I'm like, nah, man, I'm probably not gonna buy it. All right, see you later then.

[16:22] I'm like, what the [expletive]? I got one clean shoe now, and the other one's just there. And you just walked out, right? Yeah, and he just left. I'm like, what? Out of spite. Yeah, yeah. I'll be like, you could pressure me and other things, but if you like spite me, I like there, like I won't buy out of spite. Right.

[16:40] You can't like trick me and I'll be like, no, [expletive] that. But if you like pressure me and be like, you really need this or whatever, sure. Right. But if you're like, yeah, I did half your [expletive], now you're [expletive], you have to do it. I'll be like, yep, I'm [expletive], [expletive] you. Right now you're [expletive]. Like, like that's my attitude with that.

[16:53] You just cleaned my shoe for no [expletive] reason. How about that? That kind of reminds me, we're just gonna get um the bathrooms where the guy like sprays you a cologne. Oh, I hate that guy.

[17:05] Like, I don't feel like I should have to tip you for handing me a [expletive] paper towel to dry off my hands. You didn't come in here and wipe my butt for me.

[17:12] And like, really, like you made me more uncomfortable, right? This whole experience was less comfortable. Like, you sat in a room that smells like urine, just waiting. Watching me the entire time. I looked behind my back and he's just staring at me, like gave me a nod. No, it's weird because then he's like and clears his throat at me. Really?

[17:30] Yeah, and I'm like, no, like, and then after, especially at like a bar, because I've been to bars where they have them in Vegas, and like, man, once you break the seal, I'm in and out of here 12 times.

[17:40] Like, I'm not gonna keep t tipping you every time I gotta take a piss. I've already been in here six other times. No, yeah. I can't, and imagine what it was like before cell phones. Oh like that guy just sat in a bathroom, right?

[17:51] Like, just like, well, what could you do before cell phones? Like a Rubik's Cube, like maybe at a book, right?

[17:57] Just no, I have seen a guy with a book. Uh, maybe they read the back of their cheap cologne bottles or something. Yeah, he's like, Oh, made in Mexico. Oh, that must be good. Breaking out all right. And again, we respect everybody who works. It's just like that's gotta be a rough job to like again because you just stay in the bathroom, right? It's not like you you you wait till someone goes in and then you follow them in, which would be even more pretty. That'd be really weird. But you're like, all right, you're gonna spend how how many hours like do they take two? They must be smoking, just one guy. You can't do eight hours in a bathroom, right? That can't be a thing.

[17:57] No, I think it's just one guy for how long. Like, I'm just I'm not making fun of it. It's just like oh, I totally am.

[18:36] Like, how is that even a real job?

[18:37] Like, did they even hire you to do that?

[18:39] Or did you just show up one day and you're like, hey, I want to be that guy who hangs out in the [expletive] and then hands people moist towelettes?

[18:46] It's just weird. I don't know.

[18:47] Like, I like and like we joke about like if we make enough money, but like I don't ever want to get to a point where someone waits for me to take a [expletive] or like take a piss and then like spray me with something and hand me a piece of paper. Like, that's just uh part of my life. I never like if I'm rich, like I still would like just to have be able to use a bathroom.

[19:06] My own privacy, yeah, yeah. Really weird. Um you have company come over and they're like, Nick, who's that guy in the bathroom? Like, oh, I hired him. So I make six figures now.

[19:17] Yeah, I'm kind of loaded, so he just hangs out in the bathroom. It's no big deal. His name's Jeff. You can talk to him, and he's a really cool guy. Oh my god.

[19:27] All right, I don't think I have any more like sales stories, really.

[19:31] I get that. Me either. Wanna do our episode?

[19:34] Oh, yeah. Nate's like super excited. He like worked really hard in this story, and I've been like canceling sessions because I've been feeling well. I thought I had the COVID at one point, thinking it's fine. So feel bad for Nate. He was sick, so you should probably have some people sign up for the Patreon. It's only a lot of people. Or leave a review, guys. I'm not gonna lie. Uh we we've actually we have new patrons still, but reviews have like dried up. Right. We have not gotten a written review in in months. On anything, leave it on any platform, just leave it. Yeah, please, please, Scott. But come on, uh without further ado, oh, today we're gonna be doing a call of Cthulhu episode, bringing it back.

[19:34] And this episode I would like to call the ghost train. Oh god. Yeah, I'm really excited. Uh ghosts and trains for fans of the show, for you nat natty ones, whatever we're calling our fans. I don't know. Yeah, I don't know. We need to usually what you say. Leave that in a comment. Like, what would you guys like to be called? Like, like uh in the last episode of uh Rick and Morty, did you see they have like the Stan Lee? Oh well, just they make a reference to another episode, and then like a Rick Stanley is like, hey, Rickheads, and like watch episode blank blank to get this reference. And like that's what we need. We need well one, we need like a random like person to pop up, right?

[19:34] But uh but anyway, God, where the [expletive] is I gone with this? Oh, what are you gonna call yourselves? That's what yeah, we're gonna call yourselves. Uh but also join the Patreon because [expletive], it's gone again. Let's just go. Oh, I love trains. I love trains. If you listen to our show, I love trains. Okay. Nate's tired. It's been a long week, I guess. Let's go. Okay. So we start off the story. Nate. Wait, real quick, before we do Yes. We all how long are we gonna spend on the exposition? Because anytime we've ever this is just a joke, but anytime we've ever done these episodes, I think you budget like 15 minutes, and then we do like a 48-minute exposition before we even like start the plot.

[19:34] So how long would you like me to derail your story before we actually do the story? Let's just throw a time down so our fans know, you know. Okay. Because I can I can see what like when you're like, I like to actually like start my plot now. Right. It usually happens like 50 minutes in. Oh, uh this one doesn't matter. I actually actually prepared this time for that. Oh, wow. Yeah. Challenge accepted.

[21:52] I can roll plot points into whatever [expletive] we're gonna be talking about before we actually get to plot points.

[21:58] Prove it. Let's do it.

[21:59] All right, let's do it. Nate, who is your character and what's going on with him?

[22:04] Yeah, um, so you gave me a premise, and uh basically my character's name is Gru. He's kind of um like a vagrant, like traveling, uh maybe like homeless. He basically he's like the guy who like stows away in trains or the abandoned trains, like he lives in them. But he keeps like obviously somebody owns the property somewhere at some time, they find him, they kick him out. He keeps getting the boot, and he just wants to like you know, feel his oats and just find a place where he can like you know, whatever, walden, pond, like, you know, just live his best life. Yeah, yeah, I know you like the literary references. I like that book though. Yeah, yeah.

[22:04] Um, so yeah, he's just looking for a place, like a usually abandoned trains is like his like big thing. His go-to. And and so recently, uh, I mean, you can share the full story, but he has a lead about maybe a train that people don't know about, and it might be a place where he can retire permanently. I like it. I like his gist. So we'll roll into it. Now, rumors have been spreading about a small town uh uh called Amherst, and the rumor mill is saying that a small boy named Ben Montgomery was recently found deceased by some old retired railroad tracks right outside of Armorist, and that's pretty much all you've ever caught the gist of. So I don't know how you were planning on traveling to this town. Light. Are you hitchhiking?

[22:04] Yeah, and I think uh the proper title in the 1920s was a vagabond because everything was nicer. Oh, okay. You weren't just a homeless piece of [expletive], you know, like you're a vagabond. All right, yeah, I like that. Okay, so you're hitchhiking and um you hop into some guy's truck and where you heading? Oh, you know, wherever uh the road takes me. Uh but no, actually specifically, there's a town called uh Amherst, I think.

[24:04] Alright, alright. I drive right by there. Uh at least the turnoff point, anyways. Uh what would even make you want to go out that way?

[24:11] Well, it sounds like Amethyst, which I'm wearing around my neck. It's uh one of my spirit gems. Yeah, it's nice. Uh well, uh probably so great, but uh my southern I don't know where I'm going. I'm trying to go hippie. Um have you uh you heard the legend of uh some legend? Because I'm tired today. Uh ghost train. Something about uh kid dying or some [expletive]. I don't know.

[24:39] Yeah, I heard they found some dead little boy out by some tracks out there uh probably a week ago.

[24:46] But and correct me if I'm wrong, but there's no like I know trains. All right. I know trains, but uh there hasn't been uh like a running train track in in ages.

[24:57] No, not since that new expressway came in. No train been coming down these parts for quite some time, at least 10 years or so. And that town itself's kind of fallen off the map. I haven't talked to anybody or been to that town in probably 10, some odd years, you know, just no reason to go down there since the train station closed down. Why'd it close down? Uh I don't know. Just one thing or another, and then it just trains stopped going through. I don't know what's the deal with it. I'm not that curious about things.

[25:24] I stick to my cows and whatnot. Groo, stop listening, just writes down train station abandoned. Like maybe I can live here. Yeah, question mark. Cozy?

[25:35] Yeah, a little bed and a character. Ooh.

[25:39] Oh, yeah, it'd be uh any chance. Uh you say you're swinging that way, right? Uh kind of just going by the road that takes you there, and that's about as far as I go. There's no reason for me to go all the way down in the town. It's sure, sure, sure. Quite some time. Just wherever you're going and in that direction, tangent and perpendicular, whatever. I know a lot of words for a vagabond. Ooh, nice, nice. Well, you seem very well educated. I'll be happy to take you that way. Let's go. Nice. They they they swap stories about his life on the road in a truck and my life on the road not in a truck, sometimes in a train, sometimes walking. Do you think the earth is flat? Oh yeah. Oh yeah.

[25:39] Yeah, totally could be, huh? Yeah. And God is a woman. I don't know, but get the [expletive] out of my truck. Sacrilegious. So uh he gets goddess.

[26:32] He gets up to uh the main road. There is a sign and it's like decrepit and old, but it says amorist, arrow pointing that way, and it's just a lone single-lane looking dirt road, and it takes you down, and that's about where he drops you off at.

[26:47] Thanks a lot, man. Uh, really appreciate it. Uh sure you don't want to just kind of scoop me down though. I mean, like, I can't take you like I'm sure people go down this road all the time, right?

[26:58] No, not really. I haven't seen anybody up and down this for quite some time. And come find out, I'm in a bit of a hurry, so um I'm gonna find out.

[27:06] I'm gonna like like you just found out while talking to me. Yeah, just recently uh carrier pigeon. Can't even drop a letter off. Uh best of luck to you, and he peels out. Uh-uh. Well, I guess it's just me and the road, as it's always been, and it always will be. And then he like rubs his like amethyst like gem necklace. Okay, I like it.

[27:32] Uh, so you're gonna start walking down the old road while you're monologuing?

[27:35] Yeah.

[27:35] Uh roll me a dexterity check. Uh it's good. It's a oh yeah, it's a pass. Your pass. I was gonna have you tripping a pawhole or something, but you passed.

[27:46] So uh it takes you a couple hours, but you finally uh approach the small town of Amherst that lays in this kind of small valley. Uh it's a few hours' drive from Arkham itself, but you managed to leave Arkham, got to the road, and it's a couple hours of walking down there. Um there's only the one road that cuts directly through the middle of town, and it dead ends right at the old churchyard there.

[28:12] And it's your basically quaint little 1920s small town.

[28:16] There's a couple, there's one general goods store, uh, couple small houses, uh, a school house in the typical old-fashioned red building. Everything's got white picket fences around it and all that jazz. And then the immaculate-looking, beautiful church with a small graveyard in the front, and it's just a white church with a wooden cross at the top. Kind of basic blah blah blah.

[28:41] Yeah, I've seen those around. Uh I am going to start at the church. Um, okay.

[28:47] Yeah.

[28:48] All right. So uh you walk up to the church, yeah, and there is an old pastor uh tending to the flower garden right out front. Um excuse me, uh sir. Oh yes, how's it go? Oh, I think it goes well, heavenly uh father man, sir. That's me. Sorry. How old are you?

[29:10] I'm roughly about 75 years old. Give or take a couple years. Birth certificates weren't a big thing 76, 5, 4 years ago, you know.

[29:21] Oh, wow, okay. Well, uh lovely garden.

[29:24] You're gonna have to speak up a little bit. My ears, you see, are filled with wax and hair.

[29:29] Yes, yes, I can see that. Uh hey, I'm all about natural too. I haven't showered in days, and I don't usually wash my underarms.

[29:35] Oh, uh, okay.

[29:38] But no, I love this uh this beautiful garden. Uh anything that grows on the earth and uh and nourishes our planet is um I'm a big fan. Um but speaking of nourishing the planet, have you buried any small children recently?

[29:51] Uh no one in our town has died in quite some time. It seems that everyone's in tip-top, healthy shape, if you know what I'm saying.

[29:59] Well, no, I don't. Um I'm talking about the Montgomery boy.

[30:04] Uh I uh Montgomery, you say. I don't have no recollection of uh Montgomery here in the town, and I know everybody in town because we all love Jesus. And we all come to church on Sunday. Speaking of which, are you gonna come to church on Sunday?

[30:21] Oh, I pray to a like a three-headed goddess with elephant nose.

[30:25] Oh, you're one of those guys, huh? Alright, so I take it you're just passing through.

[30:30] Yeah, just you know, wanted to pay my respects and then uh, you know, find find my my plot of dirt, my own garden, uh, you know, growing. Not one I pay for, but you know.

[30:41] I can see that. Uh I guess if you're curious, you can always ask around at the school if maybe a new family moved in who also worships a three-headed elephant thingamajigger.

[30:54] Uh Krishna, but thank you. Sure, you bless you. Bless you, Father. Thank you.

[31:03] Oh, you're very welcome, my boy.

[31:05] And then a uh as you glance back up, roll a sanity check for me. Absolutely not. Okay, so you fail.

[31:14] So uh in your vision, you glance up after staring at the father, and uh, you don't know if it's because of the sun or what, but the church now looks like it has a huge hole in the roof of it, and then it'll just looks run down, and it looks like it's even caught on fire at some point. But then as you blink and kind of double check, it's back to the way it was.

[31:37] Father, did did you see that before?

[31:39] Uh I'm just dealing with these chrysanthemums here. Oh, chrysanthemum.

[31:44] I'm sorry, listen. Uh no, never mind, never mind. It must be my panic attacks. And he like starts licking the amethyst crystal and like calms him down.

[31:52] Oh, you should try some juniper root. I heard that's good for you. Big old throbbing root in your mouth. Take that anxiety right away.

[32:02] Yeah, um, that sounds great. Uh uh right after I visit the the school. So I can just walk into the school, you said.

[32:10] Uh the Miss uh what's her teeth? Uh Mrs. Brown should be there.

[32:19] You couldn't remember Brown.

[32:20] Shut the [expletive] up, dude. I had it written down. Well you're jumping around. My name's Jim Young, by the way. I have a name. The story's accurate. But Mrs. Brown should be there, uh, probably grading the little children's papers and whatnot. I d I don't know what teachers do, but me myself, I'm a teacher of God, and you should try to come on Sunday, maybe.

[32:43] Oh, I'm a teacher too of economics, but I gave that all up to uh build my own monetary system made of crystals.

[32:51] Oh, yes, one of those when the collection plate comes around, you give it a hard pass.

[32:56] Uh I don't know what you're talking about.

[32:59] Paint's not cheap!

[33:01] To keep this church up, you know. Yeah, it uh it looks in great shape for uh uh, you know, since the fire.

[33:09] Oh, we've never had a fire here. I boy are you saying you're gonna burn down my church?

[33:15] No, no, father. You must have misheard it. Oh my god! Have a good day.

[33:19] My heart!

[33:20] My heart walks away. He grabs his uh chest and kind of lays down in the tulips or chrysanthemums. Okay, so we're he's just like I like muttered Krishna under my breath. Bless you. He's fine.

[33:37] I like that chap. He stinks a little a little ripe though, but hey, to each their own, we're all children in God's eyes. Who is he talking to? Himself and the flowers. Yeah, uh yeah. Oh yeah, good boy, good boy juniper root.

[33:59] Okay. Uh so I am heading over to the school. Um what time of day is it? Can you remind me? Oh, I'm gonna say it's like you left probably early in the morning. It's probably a little after lunchtime by this point. Okay, and then is it a weekday or a weekend? Yeah, it's just the middle of the street. Okay, so literally I'm just gonna roll into a school while it's in session. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Let's say it's lunchtime. That way she's on break.

[34:19] Okay. So you walk over to the school and the kids are out like playing in a little area or whatever, playing a stick ball. I don't know what they [expletive] played in the 20s.

[34:27] They got a stick and a ball. Yeah, they didn't have much. Yeah. And then mostly just crippling, you know, debt and deployment. Yeah. Twenties are rough. Yeah, gross. Um, you walk up the steps and it's just one small little classroom, and there is a desk in the corner, and you see a lovely younger-looking lady sitting behind it grading papers. Oh my god, she's beautiful.

[34:51] I know, right?

[34:54] Seems Pastor Jim. Where is he coming?

[34:56] He followed you down a little bit. I'm just going to the general store. I just making sure you found your way. It's a big town. Thank you, Father. Yeah. Much appreciate it.

[35:07] Thank you, Miss Libby. You're welcome, Sonny.

[35:10] You have a blessed day, okay?

[35:12] You too. Um uh you didn't by chance hear all that, did you? I heard everything.

[35:19] Talking to the teacher.

[35:26] Oh, for heaven's sake. Pastor Jim, please go back to the church.

[35:30] Thank you for your time. How can I assist you, sir? Man, do you do that all the time?

[35:36] Or uh I do it all the time. Jim, please. Very well, Mrs. Brown. It's lovely to see. Have you seen the chrysanthemums this time of year? They're looking extra lovely. Jim.

[35:49] How do you know I'm here? Like, you can just do the whole of it.

[35:52] Jim, please go back to the church.

[35:55] Oh, very well.

[35:59] You, sir. What brings you to my school? He waits a sec, like looks around the computer. Pastor Jim is still like giving me the eyeball over his shoulder as he's still walking along. Who cares? It's like uh sorry, I uh man, I thought I kind of think I've been hallucinating in this town. Uh but cute, cute, cute man, uh, gentleman, priest, father.

[36:23] Uh uh, yes, he's very old and decrepit, but we love him dearly. Now let's get to the point.

[36:28] What brings you to my school? Sorry. Well, do you have children? Are you interested in children? Well, n it's not that. It's um I heard there was a loss in your community, a small child, and and the father, uh, you know, bless his heart, uh, doesn't seem to recall the this child, and I just want to pay my respects.

[36:46] Oh, well, his memory's not the best. Uh come with me.

[36:49] Uh she walks back. I'm assuming she met you at the front door because Pastor Jim was still outside. I was imagining inside like in the classroom.

[36:57] He's like, hello! Like in the hallway.

[36:59] I'm picturing him just being outside like as you were walking in. Uh, but give me a um just give me uh an intelligence check. Let's just do that. It was a former economics teacher, which I made that up. Um I failed. Oh, okay. I was gonna say that you see Pastor Jim looking at through the glass through the window, but you don't see it. And then uh also give me a spot hidden check. Yeah, it's pass.

[37:28] Okay, pass for the spot hidden. So you do notice uh walking along, they do have pictures of the past couple years um of the the school and like her with the teacher with the students or whatever, Mrs.

[37:43] Brown. And you notice the last one left off 10 years ago. And Mrs. Brown looks exactly the same ten years ago in this picture as she does right now before you. Uh Miss Brown, wow, what a what a beautiful schoolhouse you have. How many how long have you been working here?

[37:59] Ooh, only a couple years now, I believe.

[38:03] Like a couple couple years is in like 10? Um, we might be reaching right about 10.

[38:09] I started in ooh, I can't even remember the day. But days just fly by, you know. Now, what was the name you were looking for? She's looking at like a ledger book of all past students.

[38:21] Uh Montgomery. Uh Bill? Billy? Uh I think you maybe went by William.

[38:26] Ooh, let me check. Montgomery, Montgomery. It seems there's no recollection of any Montgomery here in Amherst at the time.

[38:35] Hmm. This is the right town. And this is uh, I mean, what what do you teach geography at all? Oh, absolutely. I love geography. So is this any and like I give the like the coordinates? Latin log. Yeah, Latin log. Like, we're at this location, right? Like this is the only Amherst.

[38:51] Yes, that is for for miles and miles around. We're the only town around in this quaint little valley. I quite like it here, very much so. But sadly, no Montgomery on any kind of child registration that I have in these books here. And I remember all of my students dearly.

[39:08] Yeah, well, I would never forget your face, Miss Montgomery.

[39:13] Oh, well, thank you very much. Is that amethyst you're wearing around your neck?

[39:17] Oh, yes, absolutely.

[39:18] Locosanthemums are quite nice. You hear from outside.

[39:24] I'm quickly getting used to that and just uh continue on with my conversation. Uh he grows on you. Yeah, he does. Uh speaking of growing, I think I could see myself uh kind of growing, you know, a family here and and whatnot. Um one of the taxes like uh uh the living situation, like uh do you maybe have uh homes for uh there are two empty homes here in the neighborhood.

[39:50] Uh two families recently moved out. I can't quite remember their names. One of them was pregnant with a small child, and the other was just an elderly couple, and they decided to go to Florida for some reason or another.

[40:03] Yeah, I remember, I remember. Um Wow, that sounds awfully convenient. Um well, maybe uh you couldn't hook me up with somebody who could help me occupy that space. Uh this this could be a great place home, and uh, you know, I'd really like to do some digging. And I know you said uh you have no record of the Montgomery boy, but by all means, ma'am, I I maybe I'll hit up the library some local records. I I really think there's a mistake here.

[40:28] Oh, yes. Um, all the records, being it is a small town of Amherst, all the records are kept either at the church or in the general store. And then I'm sure, depending on the hour, uh you might be able to call the local recorder or whatever and see who has the title to the house and ways of payment or whatnot.

[40:47] Sure, sure. And I want to try to do like a quick talk. I want to like catch her off guard and just ask her about like, oh, so I can check at the church, but the records were damaged in the fire, right?

[40:56] Yeah, okay, okay.

[40:57] Roll it. It's quick. Are we saying like quick talk? Yeah, fast talk. With a 93, it doesn't matter. I failed it regardless.

[41:04] So you still say it, and she's like, no, no, there's never been any fire here in Amherst, at least that I'm aware of, and I've lived here my whole life.

[41:14] Your whole life? Yes, very much so. But you've only been working here a couple years. Correct.

[41:19] I had to go to school for a little bit in Arkham, but then I came back, and I've been the teacher here for about five or so, maybe. Time just flies by. I thought you said ten. Oh, was it ten? Oh dear. Time just it seems like it's just in and out, you know?

[41:36] These small towns. Yeah, in and out. Maybe, maybe I should consider it and out.

[41:41] God loves you. Don't don't mind him.

[41:45] No, I don't. I don't. It's kind of charming in a way. He's breathing heavily like a velociraptor in Jurassic Park on the glass. Like all right. Uh well then I don't want to go back to the church yet. Um for obvious reasons. So you said uh you gave me the contact information for somebody who can maybe look up the records or the homes.

[42:07] Yes, at the uh general store.

[42:10] Uh yeah, actually, that's perfect. I would like to pick some things up too. So yeah, uh I go to the general store. Okay with that. So it's only like two more houses down, okay, and you're at the general store. There is a uh elderly woman, snow white hair, looks like a grandma, sitting in a rocking chair out front. Why did I make so many women characters? I don't know why I do this.

[42:35] Hello, dear.

[42:38] Uh hello. Are you uh is this the general store?

[42:42] Yes, yes, it is.

[42:46] But you do you live here?

[42:48] I I I I do live here in the store.

[42:51] Oh, excellent, excellent. So are you the owner at the store?

[42:55] Yes. Miss Abby Russell is the name.

[43:01] Does she have uh uh like a speech impediment, yeah. Yeah, okay. Yeah. I didn't know she was like like malfunctional. Like she might have had like a stroke or something at some point, and she's just like, yeah. Well, you are just the sweet sole woman. I love your bonnet for the record.

[43:15] Thank you.

[43:16] Uh I had uh a couple things I need to pick up, and also I'm I'm doing a big research project. Um I'm here on a uh on a grant you know from the government to just look into the historical value of your your uh community and also um kind of write up some profiles on some of your um the ancestry of some of your people. So anyway, I just need to look up some home records and then um I'm looking for a specific name, uh like uh Mountgomery surname family.

[43:44] Oh that that that doesn't ring a bell of any kind, but feel free to look at the the state ledgers that we have hearing. Thank you.

[43:56] Yeah, yeah, absolutely that that's very kind. And then I also I'm a Take out a list, and it's like a bunch of like um plants, uh not juniper root or uh chrysanthium, uh, but some other like some like weird rock gems I'm looking for, some minerals, um things you know that keep me uh spiritually centered. Okay. Uh like do you have any of this stuff? Sorry.

[44:21] Oh d dear. Um there are a couple of the items that w we have, but I can always order you more. A delivery truck comes once a week here.

[44:34] Once a week? When? What day?

[44:36] Wednesdays.

[44:37] Okay, okay.

[44:38] Middle of the week.

[44:40] Yeah, that makes sense.

[44:41] Um Hey Abby! He needs shampoo! He stinks really badly.

[44:48] Oh that Jim Young.

[44:51] He's a rasc rascal, isn't he?

[44:58] Ah, yeah, something. Um listen, uh, go ahead and just put that on my tab. Um, you know, the one I have always had here forever.

[45:08] Okay.

[45:09] She doesn't even question it. She's like, yep.

[45:11] Okay.

[45:12] Um and yeah, I'm gonna take a look. I'll go, I'll grab those items on the way out, but I'm gonna go look up the can you point me in the direction of the public records? Uh yeah, there is a um almost like the only bookcase looking thing in town. She kind of like points her crooked finger over to it. And there are like some logbooks and then some state required like town legislative books and like bylaws and stuff. All this kind of just piled up right here in the corner. Can I roll an education and just see how quickly I can navigate through and find like useful information?

[45:46] That or a library use either one I mean.

[45:48] And then just I'm trying to like talk through. Wait. I'm gonna say that's a super success. Yeah, we'll go with that. So you just crush it, and uh, you do notice that everything seems to be backdated from ten years ago, and there's nothing newer than that on everything that you're finding. Um, there is no like the records ended 10 years ago. Yeah, and there's been nothing recent. Yes. What's the last date then? Uh geez, I didn't even come up with that. Today, ten years ago exactly. Okay, whatever today is. Sure. Okay. And then uh you did find the last name Montgomery, but no Ben Montgomery. Was this one of the pregnant um families? Yeah. Okay, okay. Um the address uh of the home? Right across the street. Okay, yeah, it's small, small neighborhood. Okay.

[45:48] Um I'm gonna go ahead and tear out the page. Okay. Um wherever it's I don't know if it's in a binder or whatever, but I'm gonna just take the record and fold it up and put it in my pocket. Okay. Um, what about like old deeds to the property or something or anything like that? Um uh there's nothing really here. It would have to be like there's the records are here, but the actual documentation is held at the bank still, probably in Arkham. Oh, damn. Okay, okay. All right. Uh well, I'm gonna collect what items uh I could find for my list. Okay. For my healing shrine. Um, I'm getting retired.

[47:12] Okay.

[47:13] Um, so I would like to retire back to the address of the Mountgomery home. Okay. And then uh roll one more, just whatever, check to see if you see something spot hidden. 31 pass. You do notice that there is a trapdoor underneath the main counter here at the general store. As somebody who likes to stow away in places that catches my attention. And I'm going to um I'm gonna ask uh the did I get the the Mississippi. Her name was uh Miss Abby Russell. Miss Abby Russell. I'm gonna ask her for something I know she already said she doesn't have. So she goes and looks for it, and then I'm going to try to access the the trapdoor. Yeah, she'll totally fall for it. She's a nice old lady and fall for your deceit.

[47:13] And then uh you grab the the hatch that leads down to the bottom storeroom, and it's just an old dusty stairway that leads down. It's dark down there.

[48:13] Okay.

[48:14] Um this is spooky. I don't have um I don't like travel with the flashlight or anything. Um as a Vagabond, I might have like maybe you got matches or something. Matches, yeah.

[48:25] Okay, so you strike up a match and work your way down the steps.

[48:28] Yeah.

[48:28] Okay.

[48:29] Uh you go down the steps, and it seems like you're getting a smell right now of like soot and ash kind of infiltrating your senses. And then everything around you besides the matchlight, it kind of when you move it, it moves with you like light bouncing off the walls, kind of. But there are just racks and racks of like pickles and [expletive] random [expletive] like that. But there's almost a weird faint yellow glow kind of pulsing down here with you. And give me a sanity check for that because it's really weird. Uh wow, not fail. So you lose uh lose three this time since that's your second fail. Two sanity points. Um just keeping track of my hand. Okay, you're gonna keep moving around. Yeah, um well, I'm a little spooked.

[48:29] I'm going to clutch uh my amethyst and uh lick it a little bit and then inhale some deep breaths and calm down, grew. Um, you know, this is just a basement. Basements in the earth. The earth is the place we came from, and we're all gonna go back to it one day, but there's no need to be afraid.

[49:39] Amen, brother.

[49:45] For those that listen to the show, Nate, like if you try to monologue, Nate will always slap you with like some like like the very first time I said anything, you wanted me to see if I tripped, like in a puddle. Like you always try to screw me over on a mall. Because in real life, that [expletive] always happens with me. Anytime I'm like, you know what, let me tell you a little bit about myself, and then I'll either fall down or a bee will sting me in the neck, or somebody'll hit me in the nuts. Like it just never works out. Nobody really monologues. Well, see, and then on on my end, like I get monologued at all the time.

[49:45] So I'm like, this is my shot, and then you just you slap it down. So um, anyway, I I'm just kind of coming to terms that sometimes I'm gonna hear Jim Young no matter what. Yeah, Father Young. He's all over the town, yeah, just all over. So uh that actually makes me feel more comfortable. Maybe I'm not alone, so to speak, and I'm gonna press, I'm gonna press on. Okay, so you work your way to the back of the storeroom, and everything seems normal except for the yellow glow. But there is a small, kind of rounded, almost like hand-carved tunnel looking thing at the back of the basement that looks like it kind of shoots down just a dark semicircular hole looking thing.

[49:45] Um I'm gonna like peer get a little closer and period, but I'm not gonna get too close. I'm not gonna touch it. Give me a uh listen check.

[51:10] Listen.

[51:12] Ooh, this will be close. Let me see. Um, here it is. Um it is a just a regular pass. Regular pass? Okay, so it sounds like you could almost hear like a church organ kind of thing coming from it along. Like we talking like dun dun dun dun dun dun like phantom, or are we talking just like like churchy music? Yeah, just churchy.

[51:37] You hear like, oh god, it's awesome! I love ham.

[51:45] And a little bit of like wind mixed in with it, like weird little tunnel sounds coming.

[51:51] I don't know what your history is as a vagabond with tunnels and stuff, but um, I'm intrigued, but also religion spooks the [expletive] out of me. Oh yeah. And Jesus music is probably more terrifying than anything in this basement. Okay. So I'm gonna be like, Jim? Yeah? What uh I'm getting a little creeped out here. What's uh what's going on down here? It smells like there's been a fire.

[52:13] Is that you, God?

[52:17] What direction is the voice coming from? From you you can hear him from the tunnel, but it sounds like what I'm picturing in my head is he's just hearing it and he's like, Whoa, where is that coming from? Jim, what the oh my god, what the and uh in my head, every time I hear Jim, like it reassures me because I'm like, alright, this old man, like there's no danger, you know, with him around. So like Jim, Jim, stay there. I'm I'm gonna I'm gonna come to you.

[52:42] Yes, my lord. I'll be here waiting for you.

[52:47] No, it's it's me, Gru, the the Vagabond who's trying to take up stead in in your town. You shouldn't try to lie to an old man like that, Gru.

[52:57] But I'll wait here patiently.

[53:00] I'm coming.

[53:01] Okay.

[53:02] So you uh hop in to the tunnel? Yeah, if I get right a hole. Cool. And then uh you start just crawling through the tunnel, making your way downtown. How tight is like the tunnel? I'm sorry, so we can it's not too bad. It feels almost like someone's crawled through this thing a couple times before. Okay, right? Like an adult or like a child?

[53:20] Maybe like a a larger child.

[53:23] Okay, maybe.

[53:24] But like it's a little tight for you, but it definitely feels like well-worn kind of deal.

[53:28] Okay, yeah. This is like maybe a Montgomery-sized hole. Yeah, perfect. Okay, so you're crawling, and then uh you get to a point where it feels like it opens up a little bit, and then you can squeeze through a little bit more, and then now uh you look around you, and there's a bunch of old decorations and stuff around you, and it looks like you're probably in another kind of basement. And give me a just a whatever roll. I don't give a [expletive]. Just roll something. Well, what am I measuring it to? Man, I am rolling targot at night if you are in the audience or listening to the podcast. Okay. Um that's a fail. You don't see anything really out of place right now. Do I see Jim Young? Uh no, he's uh upstairs.

[54:12] I'm still waiting up here.

[54:15] Oh, I thought you were down.

[54:17] I was down there and I got scared. I don't like the dock, especially since it wasn't God talking to me. Oh and my bones hurt. And it's damp down there. I don't do good with a damp.

[54:31] You done, Jim? I need a sponge bath. Okay. Uh well I'm gonna start to head back unless anything catches my attention. Maybe I'll do a spot hidden. Yeah, do another spot hidden. Or listen.

[54:44] Or whatever.

[54:47] Uh an eight. An eight? Yeah, it's a super. Oh, perfect. Uh, you do see some more glowing yellow light, and it almost looks like something came crashing down and the yellow light's like pulsing in what looks like a hole inside of this basement. I'm going to um is it's like more lit here, right? Yes. Uh the closer you get to the hole, the more bright the glow is getting. I'm gonna sit down like Indian style across my legs. Can you say Indian style anymore? Is that I think crisscross apples. Crisscross apples, yeah. So I'm gonna sit down, I'm gonna like set out my rocks and just kind of start like hymning and be like, uh, I'm trying to commune with my goddess um who I use like a different name for every time.

[54:47] Um we're gonna call her uh Lisa Lisa this time. Like Lisa Frank. Yeah. Um Dolphins guide me. Like, is this am I on the right path? Like I'm just trying to find my place in the world that is rent-free and off the grid. And I am getting a little creeped out in this town. There's clearly something wrong, something happened ten years ago, but at the same time, like this is the place, like this might be where I'm meant to be. Like, maybe I bring this town back to life, or I just give me some guidance. The light starts to grow brighter from down in the hole. I thought for sure you were gonna do it, Jimmy. Um are you looking down in the hole yet, or are you kind of just sitting?

[54:47] I was I was sitting very close to it, so I could like yeah, I saw the like lighting and like thank you, uh babushka. And then I pick up my rocks and stuff them into my pouch, and then I alright, you've shown me the way, and I'm gonna so is the hole like straight down? The hole is straight down, but it's not that deep. And then as you look down and see, um, there's just a yellow, faintly glowing yellow rock kind of down there, like a meteorite or something, maybe.

[54:47] I'm going to, you know, I like rocks if you've uh met me so far, and I'm going to slowly carefully, I'm not the most athletic, um, from you know, years of traveling, not eating correctly, and just you know, and uh hold on to the edge and start to lower myself down. Okay, perfect. It's only uh let's say like five foot deep. So you lower yourself down pretty easily, and you're right next to the rock, and you can still kind of see up out of the hole a little bit. My good God, Jules, this is this is it. This is the answer to my prayers. With this, I could buy a whole heap of supplies to keep traveling and find a home with. Um, this this looks like knock on it. Oh, you start touching it?

[54:47] Yeah. Okay. And uh with that, it like glows super bright and like almost blinds you for one second, and then it goes back to like it's pulsing. And then now you look around you and uh everything is really worn down and broken as far as like the storeroom itself. Uh you could see a hole going from the floor all the way up out through the ceiling of the church, and then you can see that like at one point this church was on fire, and that's what you're looking at right now. So curtains pulled back and everything's revealed like holy [expletive]. Yep [expletive] went down. Is the rock still glowing though? Uh no, now it is not glowing.

[58:12] Oh [expletive].

[58:13] You shouldn't have come down here. And then you can hear like shuffling coming down.

[58:20] Was it the same gleeful tone, or was there like a more sinister? No, it's the same, same voice. Okay. And then you hear shuffling coming towards you. Oh, uh it's okay, Jim. Uh no need to come down. I'm I'm okay. I just you know I like rocks, and I saw another one down here, but uh I'll I'll be right up for service soon. You probably want to get ready for mass. Nothing's okay anymore. And then the shuffling is getting closer. Since the fire?

[58:46] Since destruction was brought down upon the town of Amorist.

[58:53] And the shuffling's getting closer. Um I mean, I feel like I should be afraid, but I'm getting answers now, finally. Like, where's Montgomery? Where's Billy Montgomery?

[59:05] The dead have a way of speaking with us through these times.

[59:11] And then he's finally at the hole now, and he kind of like slowly peers over, and like whole half of his face is like completely burnt off, where you can see like bone showing, and his tongue's like kind of hanging out. Oh and his other eyeball is still there, but he has like this weird yellow icker kind of pouring out of the side of it, and the whole half of his body is kind of burnt and singed, and he's just looking at you.

[59:36] You shouldn't have come here, boy.

[59:40] Jim, I'm so sorry what happened to you. Uh here. Uh I have I have some rocks. Uh, if you want to he reaches out to grab you, uh roll of decks if you're gonna try to dodge. Hell's yeah, I do. I'm fast on my feet. I'm a vegmon. Yep. So you uh kind of launch off of the little hole and you're out of the hole. I'm making a run for it. And then he kind of like almost fell kind of down into it. You're making a run for it? Yeah. Okay. Sorry, Jim, but this isn't this isn't where I I I don't never settle down in one place for very long, and it has been too long in this place.

[59:40] So the the steps are old, so give me a dex going up the steps out of this church.

[60:18] Okay, so you just break through a couple steps, you scrape your leg up a little bit, you lose like one hit point. [expletive]. Oh god. And then uh but you do manage to scramble up and out. And then uh now you're out and about on the town. It's still the same time of day, but the entire town is now uh burnt down to the ground pretty much for the most part.

[60:35] Holy [expletive]. I knew I mean I knew something was up, but wow, when I'm guessing this happened like 10 years ago. Yeah. Yeah. Um [expletive]. I don't even know where to start, but I need to get the hell out of here. Give me a uh spot hidden or just a look or whatever. Man, I'm guys, I like am barely rolling under an 80. Most checks are between like 30 and and and 70. So um I fail. So uh we'll call that a sanity. So you lose two more points of sanity. Oh, and then uh give me another roll. The thing with sanity for our listeners is as you lose sanity, it becomes harder to pass. You have less, uh, you have a smaller total to work with. Um this was a what?

[60:35] Well, this is just a check to see what you can see. Uh check what spot hidden? Yeah, basically yeah. It's a pass. Okay. Uh you notice a kind of like light off in the distance, like almost like a reflection of some kind. Not like the meteor, right? Like a different light. Yeah, different light. And uh you can only assume probably with your reasoning, that's probably the old train station off in the distance. There is a small path that kind of goes over to it. Yeah, I'm going to kind of quickly I'm kind of grabbing things as I as I go, things that may be useful as a Vagabond. I know I can do a lot with a little.

[60:35] Got the little stick with the handkerchief with some stuff in it, but I also I know uh how to defend myself with like pieces of broken glass. I grab just grabbing stuff as I go and I'm heading that way. Okay, perfect. Um, as you approach the train station, it's actually in perfect functioning condition. And there is an elderly conductor kind of waiting at the ticket stand. More old people. Yep. Yeah. Yeah. Um I sigh. Like, I hope I hope this isn't like the other town. Um one ticket, please.

[62:25] Hello there, sir. Welcome. Yeah, one ticket for you.

[62:29] Yes. Uh I sorry, is this train still this the train station when it wasn't affected by the the impact of what I don't know, is that a meteorite? Oh, absolutely not. The train station's still in perfect working order. No worries here, friend. But then why have a train station here if nobody is really around anymore? Uh you turn around and look behind you, and uh the town seems to be back in perfect condition again. Like it's not it's far enough away to where you can't make out super fine details, but you look back and the church still looks upright and standing, and like the school's still there and all the buildings are still there. It's not just burnt down sticks and [expletive]. Man, I don't I need to stop buying these uh generic brand crystals.

[63:12] Well, what seems to be the problem?

[63:13] Is there something wrong? The train will be here in about five minutes or so. Yes, is this uh I'm looking for so there's an actual train that comes through here? Oh, very much indeed. It comes by every hour on the hour. Oh, perfect. Uh and I suppose uh you've had small children ride the train recently? Oh, absolutely not.

[63:32] There seems to be some kind of problem with kids playing on the tracks that are from the next town over or they used to live here or some business kids.

[63:40] Kids playing on the track. Are you guys watching out for that kind of thing? Oh, he tried to, but it's extremely hard to stop these powerful locomotives. Oh wow, so it was an accident he was just playing, and then uh Bill Montgomery?

[63:52] I'm sure if that was his name, that would be him. These things happen all the time. It's a tale as old as time. Really play on the tracks, you're gonna bound a good hit.

[64:00] Wow. It's uh deep stuff. I wonder maybe it's not a good call to get on this train. Oh no, the train's perfectly safe. I can guarantee you that, friend. Ah, well, uh, as a random stranger whose face isn't half burnt. I'm gonna take it because I cannot step back from the town. Jim Young, uh, have you been haunted by what I only assume to be maybe his ghosts?

[64:20] Oh no, the pastor, he's a lovely fella. He's a little hot up hearing and he's old and whatnot, but no, he's a great guy. He always comes by and brings me delicious cookies from time to time.

[64:30] Okay, well, um, I need a way out of here. And uh so it's a running train, okay? Where is the train going? Uh does that really matter at this point for you, friend? You look like you're in dire condition to get out of here. That's exactly the answer I'm looking at. And you kind of blink and then all of a sudden the train's like kind of there. Yeah. Like and then psh, like doing its little steam business stuff. No, I never watch. I'm a Vegabon. I don't know. Yeah, that [expletive]. The amount of sanity points you've lost, like, it's hard to tell what's going on. Uh yep. Oh, um, I already paid you, right? Oh, you have already paid me, friend. Oh, yeah. Sorry, it's been a long day.

[64:30] I can't even remember my own name sometimes.

[65:07] Oh, I can see that. You better hurry up and board the train.

[65:10] Yeah, thank you. Thank you so much, sir. Uh, and uh, if you see any ghost people come by, um definitely don't ask them um about gardening. Oh, very well. The chrysanthemums are wonderful this time of year, I've heard. Yeah, yeah. And also don't mention Jesus. All right, very well. I'd never like to say that name. Uh I try to board you. Yeah, you uh go ahead and uh you board the train, and there are some other passengers already on the train. Uh, one of them is a girl in like a flapper outfit sitting there talking gallantly in the train car. Kitty.

[65:46] And uh uh you kind of sit down in your chair and rest your eyes for a little bit, and that pretty much wraps it up for right now.

[65:54] For right now, right? For right now. Good lord. Okay. I'm glad you're doing a two-parter. I was really worried you're gonna rush through it. Nope. Yep. All right, creepy. Yeah, you figured out the whole 10-year business. So, yeah, the meteor fell on town, and they're kind of like stuck in like some weird loop. Yeah, that all makes sense, and then like the meteor can like maybe lift the veil or something. Something kind of it like shattered the illusion for a sec, but then it goes back to normal. So I get all that. Um how about probably not enough information yet about the pregnancy or oh, so my idea with that was that the family lived there, and before the meteor fell, they kind of moved out of the town, like to like another small house.

[65:54] Like maybe he's a farmer or something, want to start his farm outside of the town. And their little boy actually went and played on the old abandoned tracks, and because of the time loop thing, the train came through when he was playing on the abandoned tracks cut up. Got it. So they weren't uh they weren't in the loop. Right. Okay, yeah. They were just outside it. Well, I'm very excited to see where this goes. You know, I love trains, and uh the for our OG listeners, I think literally our first or second episode um was a train episode. But back then, man, we knew even less of what we were doing than we did now. And so we were we actually recorded, I wasn't sure if we were going to break the episodes up.

[65:54] Oh, yeah, fun story. So we did we divide them into parts, but then as we started to publish our podcast, we decided like let's just put it together. It's more fun to listen to. So it was a lot of fun, but that was our very first time. So I think this next episode back on the train. Back back to the trains, yep, back in action. Um, thank you so much, Nate, for putting that together. I'm looking forward to uh to continuing. Uh, if you enjoy the show, if you ever got sold something [expletive] from a salesman, uh let us know. Join the Patreon. It is only a dollar. And I don't, I do not say it enough. It's a dollar. It's just a dollar. It's just a dollar.

[65:54] And if you don't pay that, then you're just gonna hear the voice of Jim Young randomly interjecting. My bones hurt. Yeah, which is when you're on the toilet and just things like that.

[68:00] What exactly is a liver spot?

[68:02] Exactly.

[68:02] And why do I have so many?

[68:04] Um thank you so much for listening. Again, Nat One Presents. You can go to Nat1presents.com, Instagram.com slash Nat OnePresents. Um, we're on the Facebooks, we're on the TikToks, uh we're all the social everywhere. Just go and show us you love. Uh, good god, leave a review if you're on Apple Podcasts. For Jim's sake. For Jim's sake, and we'll talk to you next week. Thank you very much, folks.